Think for a moment about the last time you had to make a decision
…or maybe you’re at a choice point right now.
What was/is your internal state like?
Relaxed? In flow? Letting your intuition guide you? Without any anxiety or worry? Patient? Open? Curious?
Tight? Fretting? Worried about making the wrong choice? In a constant brain loop weighing the pros and cons of each option ad nauseam?
Having to choose and make decisions tends to bring up of a lot of anxiety and worry:
- Fear of making a wrong decision
- Fear of failure
- Fear of missing out (aka FOMA)
- Not wanting to commit
Last year, my theme was risk, trust, & flow. This year it is CHOICE. Learning to choose and make decisions with ease is, as I’m leaning, one of the hallmarks of waking up.
Here is the key though: on the journey of evolution, knowingness, not the brain, needs to become your trusted guide.
On the recent Life Principle training group coaching call I spoke about how I am learning to embrace every single moment as a choice in my quest to truly wake and how knowingness is the key to stop wasting my time fretting about decisions. I thought you might enjoy this short intro as well.
Check it out by clicking on the video below.
Last Monday we had the wonderful experience of spending a day with Rennie’s grandchildren (I guess they’re technically mine now too. Haven’t quite embraced the grandma label yet :-). Cora is 8 and Eben 5.
I have seldom seen two children more comfortable in their own skins. They were calm and centered within their playful exuberance and lacking neediness in their desire for connection as we wandered through an interactive aquarium and romped together on a playground.
There are many variables for them to develop this way of course, but one of them stood out like a neon sign: THE ABILITY AND COMFORT TO MAKE CHOICES. No drama, no fretting, no angst; just a short internal check and then declaring their decision.
How much do you fret with even the simplest of choices?
- Do I want to eat Chinese or Pizza tonight?
- Do I want to go out with my friends or stay home and curl up with a good movie?
- Should I follow my music passion or become the lawyer my parents want me to be.
What we don’t understand is how much this fretting and worrying takes up mental space and creates drama in our lives. When we fret, we live in our brains and are letting our egos run rough shot over us. The key out of this misery is letting knowingness guide your choices.
That means you choose to
1. Notice and observe the egos trying to control the conversation – the Saboteur, the Doubt Ego, the Resistance Ego, Anxious Annie, Worry Worm, etc. As long as they are in control of your thoughts, you will continue to fret and delay. You have to fully see them by becoming the 100% Observer. Seeing them you can let them go.
2. With the egos quieted, your brain starts quieting. You come into the present moment. You are grounded, open, curious, expanded, knowing that no matter the choice, it’s going to better than you could ever imagine.
3. In that state of quiet brain you start listening internally. Without impatience, without anxiousness, you allow knowingness to emerge and show you which path to choose.
My most powerful example of this happened in 2003. I was facing one of the most difficult decisions of my life – stay in my marriage or leave my marriage – and I was FRETTING, constantly, day and night. Should I stay, should I go. I will tell you what happened in my next blog. Stay tuned!
If you are interested and ready to explore the next chapter in humanity’s potential as we learn what it means to wake up 100%, you can start by accessing our free online Life Principles so you can start picking daily cards. They are the framework that becomes your launching pad for a leap of Life within yourself out of pain, out of fear, out of fretting, and into expansion, flow, and fear-free joy. Pick a card every day to guide and inspire you throughout the day.
In trust and flow,
Would you like additional support where we can explore what is your next best step!